CD of the album 'in amber' in gatefold cardboard slipcase, featuring the beautiful photography of Alyssa Nilsen
Includes unlimited streaming of in amber
via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
ships out within 3 days
£8.50GBPor more
Record/Vinyl + Digital Album
'in amber' on heavyweight vinyl in a gatefold sleeve, with the beautiful photographs by Alyssa Nilsen and all the accompanying prose. This is the album as it was meant to be presented!
Includes unlimited streaming of in amber
via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
ships out within 3 days
£10GBPor more
about
On a bench in the grounds of the nursing home. The bench is bequeathed by ‘George Underwood of Arundel - he loved this spot’. Difficult to understand why, hemmed in as it is by worn 70s single-storey buildings, that, while still functional, intimate that even when first commissioned as a stop gap measure, they were only a shade above a pre-fab.
His daughter sits, perched on the edge of the outermost slat, legs tensely crossed. Despite the chill of the February morning, and the earlier drizzle requiring mopping of the seat before they could sit, they’re in the fresh air so her grey fingers, working so hard to disguise the shaking, can clamp either side of her third cigarette of this meeting. From behind it’s hard to guess her age, but perhaps you would over-estimate the 40 years that have brought her to half her father’s age. The way her hair seems to hang lifelessly, maybe, and its premature greying; or the resignation in her shoulders. From the front the story is as confused. Judging on wrinkles alone would steer you correctly, but the sallowness of her skin, the fact that the grease seems to suck in light rather than radiate it… Her midriff is beginning to show signs of abuse, even though she had her kids early enough that young muscles bounced back.
She doesn’t cry. But she tells her dad, twice her age, that it’s happened again. Another divorce in the paperwork stages. Another promise tempted away by the warm, wet tightness of youth. What is she doing wrong? Why her? Like Monty Python’s Black Knight, her self-esteem has taken another dismembering blow. Still it won’t give up. But it is a shard of what it once was.
Perhaps she would have told her mum this, if she had still been around, or if they had been able to communicate better. But she isn’t. So on the justification of her Wednesday afternoon visit to dad - she has a regular Saturday morning shift, so can take the afternoon off - she unloads into his calmness and understanding.
lyrics
Don’t look to me for fairness
The feckless get ahead
And the one who comes in third
Will run off with the cup
You don’t require protection
From teeming avarice or
Hands held down by your side
I know it’s not enough
To love
If you’re still lonely
It’s the touch
Of us
That draws you homeward
I know why you came here
And I know how you hurt, it’s
Like looking in a mirror 40 years ago
You know that you’re just like me
You know that I survived
My years have taught me that
It’s time to straighten up
And breathe
It’s not too late for everything to change if you believe it
When you go, please, take these things with you:
You are strong and wise, it won’t defeat you.
But it’s harder, harder than ever before
Hush, hush
Fears can’t hurt you
It’s enough
My love
Will not desert you
Days, months
Years or longer
When I sleep
I’ll know
I left you stronger
Three renditions of “Snowflakes in July” explore all aspects of the song’s stunning beauty, including a mind-blowing 17-minute live version. Bandcamp New & Notable Aug 15, 2020
